lesbiassparrow: (Sacred chickens)
[personal profile] lesbiassparrow
For definitions of excellent that involve taking history and trampling all over it like an elephant over lilies.

First, the not-dead Octavian has been discovered. Tyrannus has decided he wants to die. In the arena. Mark Antony is now taunting him. Or possibly just wibbling. I can't decide. Rapax has turned up to snag the wayward vestal virgin; just in time, given that she and Octavian were making goggly eyes at each other and the virgin bit was tottering. And given that they buried devirginized vestals alive, that is a dangerous state for one of them to be in.

ETA: LOOK AT MY AWESOME ICON MADE BY THE AWESOME [livejournal.com profile] queenofthorns. Take heed. THE SACRED CHICKENS GET THEIR REVENGE. ALWAYS.

ETA 1: Tryannus in a moment of despair has gone over to Antony. So Octavian is down a vestal and a gladiator. And now Octavian is off asking for Cicero's help. He needs his voice! Cicero appears keener on gardening.

ETA 2: In an improbable event even for this improbable show, Cicero, Agrippa and Octavian have been captured by Caesar's legendary lost legion. Which apparently wants to cut off Octavian's head because he decimated their legion. So they vanished into the mist. THE MISTS OF ITALY. Or possibly Asia, because now they're talking about Mithradates.

ETA 3: Now there is a manly face off between Octavian and Tyrannus. TRAGICALLY THEY ARE ON DIFFERENT SIDES. Some good nostril flaring as well.

ETA 4: So, I could tell you what is happening but I don't think you'd believe it. Even after all I've posted. But I am disappointed that they didn't have the guts to have Octavian and Tyrannus kill Antony...at the battle of Mutina. I mean, why stop there? Did they suddenly discover some part of historical integrity or did they think they might be a sequel. EMPIRE II: THE EMPIRING.

ETA 5: So...somehow, quite remarkably, they've decided that Vesta and Minerva are the same goddess. Oh and Augustus won't get his vestal because he's made her head of the order. THE TRAGEDY. Because she wasn't off-limits enough as a regular vestal. But Tyrannus is off to be with his kid. So someone is happy, at least. Well, Cicero appeared remarkably happy for a person who once called Octavian a murderous youth. So, yay, Cicero?

ETA 6 And so it is done. I also have The Last Legion to watch but I'm afraid that if I do so right away my head might explode.
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lesbiassparrow

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