Too Stupid to Live: Reality TV for the Historically Thick

[lesbiassparrow]

jonquil suggested that Marie Antoinette and Mary, Queen of Scots would top her list of 'too stupid to live' of candidates for a reality TV show for the historically moronic.

And because I have no original thoughts of my own, I thought I'd rip her off be inspired by her genius and list some potential candidates for this, the reality show to end all reality shows.  I know there are many more but my brain has curled up in a corner to die for a bit and refuses to be useful.

1. Marie Antoinette.  I don't think I really need to expand on this one.

2. Mary Queen of Scots.  For the Darnley episode alone followed closely by the insane stupidity of her marriage to Bothwell. I am always suprised that she did not come out with a plan to dance through her kingdom with a big sign saying 'I don't like Scotland!  I have no idea what I am doing!  Get rid of me please!'

3. Richard the Lionhearted.  It's impressive isn't it - bleeding a country dry for pointless campaigns in the Holy Land and still coming across as the good guy? This is the magic of PR.  I am actually not sure if he counts as absolutely stupid or as a complete wanker obsessed by waging war. But I still nominate him.

4. Scott of the Antartic.  Leader of not just a doomed expedition but one doomed by planning that looks like it was done on copious amounts of crack.  Also I am particularly fond of the fact that they used biscuit tins to keep the bit of their hut where the men lived from the bit where the officers lived in.  Because you wouldn't want to die without maintaining proper protocol.

Suggestions for other candidates?  They'd probably all kill each other or die of starvation in a week especially as they would have no servants, minions, court jesters, or courtiers.

ETA: some suggestions received: Nicholas II and Alexandria; Charles I & II and Warren G. Harding.  And now Catherine Howard.  Just think how good a reality show this would be!  The frocks alone would be worth tuning in for. Plus the outbreaks of violence.

It's rather depressing how many of these people have romantic reputations and lots of glossy films about how tragic and noble they were. 

Comments

[calapine.livejournal.com]

::vaguely defends Mary, Queen of Scots in some sort of patriotic act::

Um, her Mum did a pretty good job of ruling the country when Mary got shipped of to France?

Personally charming but politically naive?

...um...

Yes.

[dangermousie.livejournal.com]

Nicholas II? Useless and weak and autocratic at the same time.

Charles II. And I like the Cavaliers.

[jonquil.livejournal.com]

Scott of the Antarctic was both incompetent and evil. As I recall, he made it clear to Mr. "I'm just going out; I shall be some time" that his heroic suicide was the expected thing.

Warren G. Harding was amazingly stupid, although it didn't come out until he was dead.

Why *did* Richard get all the good P.R., anyway? I know not.

Let us not forget, in the list of Mary's stupidities, that she insisted on taking asylum in England instead of France, because she was confident that a cousin Queen wouldn't do anything to her. Yeah, right. It takes real effort to grow up at a Valois court and be that politically ignorant.

[sucrelefey.livejournal.com]

Mary of Scots certainly didn't learn a thing from her first mother-in-law Cathrine. You would think some of that would rub off.
Some of the pharaohs(names escape me) were not all that bright.

[morwen_peredhil]

I nominate the idiotic Catherine Howard, for marrying Henry VIII — who had executed her cousin Anne Boleyn on trumped-up adultery charges — then actually cheating on him.

[queenofthorns.livejournal.com]

Kaiser Wilhelm II, who ignored Bismarck's very sage advice about not getting involved in any Balkans-related wars!!

Francois I of France - great patron of the arts; extremely bad soldier, who got a spanking at Pavia from Charles V and whose ransom cost France dearly.

[sucrelefey.livejournal.com]

The husband nominates Archduke Franz Ferdinand.

Amenhotep IV aka Akhenaten, I think religous revolution without the priests is a good idea.

[sucrelefey.livejournal.com]

Quote from snowy_owlet
"(2a) King Leopold II of Belgium is on my Top Five List of Historical Figures Whom I'd Like to Kick. Hard."

And then her brilliant:http://snowy-owlet.livejournal.com/424394.html
Love the tag "boneheads of history"