THEY MOVE LIKE COUGARS

[lesbiassparrow]

Upon reflection, I felt that Mountain Men was too wondrous an episode of Highlander not to share with everyone.




The episode opens normally enough, with Boy Wonder being all irritating and, for some reason that is never explained, having his shirt open. No! DO NOT WANT. But Tessa doesn't notice because she is going up into the mountains to sketch and have fun and probably reflect on the glories of a day without him there.


But the MOUNTAIN MEN are there. They're so mountainy. Have I mentioned that THEY MOVE LIKE COUGARS?


Noes! Tessa is captured. Chief and most mountainy Mountain Man sez 'Tess you iz ma woman now!'


Marc Singer does his crazy eyes. Man, I love him in this.


Duncan discovers Tessa isn't home and immediately thinks of danger and Mountain Men. As you do. Mind you, with his uncanny ability to have those around him endangered this is not an unreasonable supposition.


Craggy cop tells him of Mountain Men who MOVE LIKE COUGARS.


Duncan looks concerned. His concerned face happens to be the same as his 'I smell an immortal' face and pretty much all his other faces, but we mustn't criticize him for that. He's only had 400 years to get them right.


Cop and grizzled local watch him head off and take bets on just how dead he will be when they find his corpse.


This is, naturally, the perfect moment for a flashback to his last adventure with a Mountain Man.


There was some manly fighting and comparing of the skins. This passed for entertainment in the good old days.


Craggy cop reflects on the lack of dead Duncan and wonders about men who MOVE LIKE COUGARS.


The Mountain Men do some great standing around being smelly and reeking of mountains. And Chief Mountain Man straddles well.


Tessa sadly still longs for Duncan and his one expression. He, at least, washes on a regular basis.


Chief Mountain Man wonders if she'd be more impressed if he showed her his knife.


'Eat yer vittles and stop yer grievin,' he sez.


THEN HE DOES HIS CRAZY EYES


Followed by an airing of his axe. Clearly the possession of any large, pointy object means that he is an immortal. AN IMMORTAL WHO MOVES LIKE A COUGAR.


Meanwhile, there's been a whole subplot with Duncan jumping off a cliff, coming back to life and then ripping his shirt off.


Then he runs slowly through some water in case there hasn't been enough fanservice.


And lurks in undergrowth. Eating berries so we know he can live off the land.


Chief Mountain Man tries his wooin' some more.


Duncan lurks some more. At this point he looks like he's been living in the woods for years not just a day or two.


It's like he's channeling the entire cast of Last of the Mohicans


This is followed by the deshirted fight in the traditional way of his people. This is the point at which Chief Mountain Man utters the immortal words 'FIRST I TAKES YER QUICKENIN', THEN I TAKES YER WOMAN.'


He spoke too soon! Duncan triumphs, has his orgasm quickening and all is right with the world again.

STILLS CANNOT CAPTURE THE SHEER AWESOMENESS OF THIS EPISODE. IT WILL REMAIN AN EVERGREEN MEMORY IN MY MIND FOREVER.

Comments

[meganbmoore.livejournal.com]

But where is the joyous reunion?

[lesbiassparrow.livejournal.com]

I think I might have passed out the sheer excess of it all after the fight, so I'm not sure if there was much of a joyous reunion. I bet Tessa was more keen on a bath as she is a very practical woman.

[lage-nom-ai.livejournal.com]

I LOVE YOU.

AHAHAHA, how could I have forgotten the JUMPING OFF A CLIFF bit--and the way the sound effects handily gave us the CRINKLY CRUNCH of bones knitting back together? It was awesome.

Also, clearly if you're going to have people who MOVE LIKE COUGARS, then you must cast the BEASTMASTER.

[lesbiassparrow.livejournal.com]

And the opening scene where they CHUCK SOME RANDOM COPS OFF A CLIFF TOO AND DUNCAN SEES THEIR RIPPED CLOTHES AND BADGES AT THE BOTTOM OF THE CLIFF. Because there is only one cliff you can use for tossing people off.

I really wanted The Beastmaster to summon a bear and have it maul Duncan. That would have been AWESOME.

[namastenancy.livejournal.com]

Oh dear. You've got a bad case of Highlander. Shirtless Duncan + deadly dialogue will do it every time. If you are in the mood, Sylvia Volk wrote some of the best HL fan fiction around. It's well worth checking out:

http://members.shaw.ca/sylviavolk/

[lesbiassparrow.livejournal.com]

I can't wait for seasons 2 & 3 to arrive. Who knows what wonders they will bring!!!

[namastenancy.livejournal.com]

Oh, and you won't be surprised to learn that Boy Wonder (aka Stan Kirsch) hasn't done anything since HL. Sort of makes me wonder if he was "doing" somebody in the company to get the job in the first place. He's not that cute (IHMO), he's supremely untalented and lacked both sex appeal and charisma.

[lesbiassparrow.livejournal.com]

I have no idea why they use him so much; I guess that in the end they figured they might as well keep him and not switch him out for a more appealing actor? His ability to become imperiled is pretty impressive though.

[meyerlemon.livejournal.com]

HA HA HA HA HA HA HA.

HA HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

OMG. I was really far in to this before I realized that the Duncan flashback had ended and he was now actually running around (LIKE A COUGAR Y/N) in the woods chasing the mountain men/the lady. I... guess I don't really understand how Highlander works.

[lesbiassparrow.livejournal.com]

I... guess I don't really understand how Highlander works.

You and me both. I just marvel at the wonders it provides. THEY MOVE LIKE COUGARS.

[chelseagirl47.livejournal.com]

Good lord. Once upon a time, someone gave me tapes of the first seasons of HL and I have apparently blocked this one due to the trauma.

[lesbiassparrow.livejournal.com]

No!!!! How could you ever forget this episode! I will never, ever let this slip from my memory.

[wistfulmemory.livejournal.com]

I laughed so hard while I scrolling through the pictures and reading the commentary, and my laughter became even louder whenever I read "MOVE LIKE COUGARS".

In normal dramas, the innate ability to know one's true love is in danger would be squeed over; here, it just makes me laugh.

The rugged, mountain man look does not work well on the main actor (actually, pretty much no look works on him...).

Since there was basically no plot, they really had to up the fanservice, didn't they? Or was that done in order to counterbalance the mountain men?

I am confused, however, at why, in the picture of the two guy fighting, they are holding the other person's weapon.

[lesbiassparrow.livejournal.com]

I am confused, however, at why, in the picture of the two guy fighting, they are holding the other person's weapon.

Um. I forget. I think at some point (probably the jumping off the cliff bit) Duncan loses the sword and Chief Mountain Man ends up with it. And then hangs onto it as it is clearly a much flashier weapon than his axe. In the final face off Tessa somehow has a sword too, but she just sort of waves it around uselessly.

[morwen_peredhil]

This is glorious! You had described bits of in your previous post, but I didn't really understand the true wonder of the mountain men who move like cougars and Duncan's one (1) facial expression until now.

I am going to have to watch this someday, for which you are squarely to blame.

[lesbiassparrow.livejournal.com]

The pictures without the accompanying dialogue and CRAZY EYES in movement are but a pale shadow of the true glories of the episode. YOU MUST WATCH.

[nyssa23.livejournal.com]

*is dead of laughter* OMG I MUST SEE THIS.

[lesbiassparrow.livejournal.com]

It is my sincere belief that everyone should watch this episode of Highlander; I honestly cannot express how totally amazing it is in live action. THEY MOVE LIKE COUGARS.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_eliza_b/]

This made me laugh so much. I love it when you write about so-bad-they're-good shows.

P.S. I vaguely remember watching this show when I was little. I think I realized it was dumb, and this was when I thought Power Rangers was high quality television.

[lesbiassparrow.livejournal.com]

Words cannot express the pleasure that watching this episode gave me. Though, I am reliably informed that there are moments later on in the seasons where Highlander actually gets honestly good. But even as it is, it is endless fun.